I haven’t been on here in years.. but whether people see or read this or not does not matter. This matters to me saying my own piece about my own experience with grief.
How does one go on with losing a parent at a young age? Especially a girl without a father. How do you accept he won’t meet your children or walk you down the aisle. How does one go on with life knowing this but always still wanting this to all happen.
My father and I in my opinion never had the greatest relationship, but he always thought otherwise. Since his passing all I have heard is how highly he spoke of me to his close friends. Me on the other hand not so much. Growing up he was the bad cop, my mother was the good cop. He pushed my buttons more than I would’ve ever expected but that was his job, he was my dad. Dads have a certain affect on their daughters in my opinion whether everyone believes that or not and whether that effect be good or bad.
My father got diagnosed in September 2020 and passed away November 2021. Fourteen months and now he will never be present with me.
Thats a key thing I think most people forget, a loved one who has passed with always be with you, their spirit will always be with you but their actual presence won’t be ever again.
I have so many regrets with my dad. How am I ever supposed to forgive myself for not being a better daughter and being as appreciative as I could have been.
It was less than 36 hours when I found out he would never get better. Hospice care was a topic but he never made it. It was so terrifying being there for his last moments of life but also at the same time I couldn’t of imagined being anywhere else.
How does one move on with regret and what ifs.
